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What are the English gloating about? July 25, 2013

Posted by Ankit Poddar in Cricket Rant, Humor Rant.
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No seriously, what are they gloating about?

That they have a new prince? That they have won in rugby? That they have  a Brit Wimbledon champ after so long? That they have the Aussies on the mat in The Ashes?

You would read all the questions listed above and if you are an Englishman, respond with a resounding “Yeah!” So for the Englishmen, this is my response.

    1. You have  a new prince, in prince George Louis. Well, good for the namesake royalty. But really, is that really worth gloating about? That the father of the child had the balls to father a child? I belong to a country of over 120 cr. in population. Seriously, birthing a child is no big deal for us Indians, we bring a new life in this world almost every second.
    2. Rugby. Well, really who cares about that sport in India. Sachin Tendulkar doesn’t play rugby.
    3. Brit Wimbledon champ. Well, for one, it is just one of the Slams held every year and it shows the lack of depth in the English tennis lines that you did not have a champ in a slam held in your country for so many years. And for second, weren’t we reminded every year of Andy Murray’s Scottish background until this one? Suddenly, he is all Brit?
    4. The Ashes. Australia have lost only 2 of the first 2 tests in the 5 test match series and boy, they have every chance in hell to make a fightback happen and win the Ashes urn this time around. Well, may not every chance in hell, but a mathematical / statistical chance nevertheless. So why don’t you first ensure that the series is indeed won and the urn is locked in your cupboards for the next 15 4 months.

No seriously, what are they gloating about?

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Meaning of Ashes to an Indian November 28, 2010

Posted by Ankit Poddar in Cricket Rant, Humor Rant.
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Until and unless, you are a PIO (Person of Indian Origin) in Australia, The Ashes do not mean much to you, other than a Test Series of 5 matches being played in England or Down Under between two unevenly matched sides. Or so you thought!

The Ashes mean much more than that to an average Indian. I have made a list of 3 things that The Ashes means to us.

3. The Ashes are related to Haridwar and to a lot of mourning for an average Indian.

2. The Ashes are something they show in a lot of Hindi movies from Ram Lakhan to 3 Idiots, that form a major crux of the story line moving forward.

1. The Ashes are what they drank in Due Date, thinking of that as Coffee.

There are times when The Ashes might be used in a different context. However, these times are also as frequent, as they are used in the context of cricket. In these times, The Ashes might be mispronounce as Asses.

Like in the following context:

Those Assess think that they play better cricket than us. However, we showed them what are true potential is by not letting them win after the Sydney episode. Assess!

In no context, do the Ashes mean the following to Indians

3. The Ashes

2. The best cricket series involving Australia. That is called the Border Gavaskar Trophy.

1. The most important battle in cricket heritage. That is India v/s Pakistan.